Why getting hit by a softball is a bad idea

[ellid]

About sixteen years ago, I was the backup catcher for a softball team in the Greater Springfield Lawyers' League. I wasn't very good, but I had a lot of fun, and once we even managed to win the league championship.

One night I arrived just in time to watch a couple of our players warming up. One of them, who cut down trees for Lashway Lumber, wound up and threw a really hard throw at our team captain.

He missed. And hit me directly in the right breast.

The resulting bruise was large, almost perfectly round, and approximately the color of fresh asphalt. helwen loaned me some arnica gel, which helped quite a bit, but my chest was still an interesting shade of yellow-green for about a month afterwards.

I bring this up because today was my official follow up appointment for the biopsy. The nurse practitioner gave me the official good news that everything was benign, there were no atypical cells, and basically I was fine. She then cocked her head, looked me straight in the eye, and said, "Did you suffer from a traumatic injury to your breast? Because there's some fat necrosis consistent with a blow or a severe bruise."

Yep. It's true. I underwent a biopsy, three weeks of fear and two days of sheer hell because a lumberjack lost control of a softball.

I live a very, very weird life.

Comments

[soberloki.livejournal.com]

*facepalm*

Seriously, is there any other possible response?

[helwen.livejournal.com]

Good grief! Well, it's known that many things from our youth will come back to haunt us, including healthwise, but that's definitely different.

[tekalynn.livejournal.com]

And people wonder why I'm so neurotic around people throwing balls.

So glad everything turned out okay! Here's to a clean bill of health.